Common Cold
by Ogden Nash
Go hang yourself, you old M.D.!
You shall not sneer at me.
Pick up your hat and stethoscope,
Go wash your mouth with laundry soap;
I contemplate a joy exquisite.
I'm not paying you for your visit.
I did not call you to be told
My malady is a common cold.
By pounding brow and swollen lip;
By fever's hot and scaly grip;
By those two red redundant eyes
That weep like woeful April skies;
By racking snuffle, snort, and sniff;
By handkerchief after handkerchief;
This cold you wave away as naught
Is the damnedest cold man ever caught!
You can read the rest of the poem here.
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At Wild Rose Reader, I have brief reviews of children's poetry books about winter.
At Political Verses, I have a kind of anti-valentine poem titled Look at the Man: A Poem Explaining Why Women with Mates Gain Weight.
Lee Wind has the Poetry Friday Roundup at I’m Here. I’m Queer. What the Hell Do I Read?
4 comments:
Hope you're feeling better soon! Great poem to share at this time of year. And while we've made such wonderful advances in medicine since Nash penned his poetry, anyone doing battle with a Cold of Colds can well relate to this one. (I wonder what Nash would write about hand sanitizer and tissues with aloe?)
Martha,
I'm taking a Chinese herbal remedy this time around. I don't want to take antibiotics again--unless I absolutely have to. I'm feeling much better this afternoon.
I enjoy light verse--and Ogden Nash was a master of the genre.
Yikes! Glad you're better!
My favorite lines (sound like you could have penned them!!):
"The Super-cold to end all colds;
The Cold Crusading for Democracy;
The Führer of the Streptococcracy."
Mary Lee--
This has been the worst fall/winter for me in regard to sinus and respiratory infections. I just I hope I kick this bug soon. At least my head doesn't hurt any longer.
I probably should pen a cold poem. We are often advised to write from experience.
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