Writing, weight, will power

   

An article in the NY TIMES once said we only have so much will power.

I hadn't read the article but I guess I believed the idea because I distinctly remember saying to myself: okay, you don't have to do anything else -- use all your willpower to finish this novel. Eat whatever you want: just finish. 

So I ate things I had never allowed myself to eat in my adult life (we're talking mango icecream, pasta etc) and I gained 30 pounds. I did get the novel finished and published, too.

But for OVER TEN YEARS the weight stayed on. Now I have lost 5 pounds, according to the doctor, not just me. Not all of it is from recent efforts -- this is since I last went to the doctor. But still: 5 pounds in the right direction. And I have continued to lose since that visit a few days ago!

The rest of this post is about HOW. I experimented with different methods and have finally found a way to lose weight  that:

a) works for me. When you're over 40 this is really hard! When I was young, I would just not eat for a few days and lose 5...that doesn't work when you're older....though when I added up the actual calorie count of what I USED TO eat in a day, why I wasn't losing weight became all too clear. Yes, it's harder when you're older but at any age those calories added up to too many!

b) I can stick to

What works for me is tracking exercise and calories. I wear a device called a Fitbit that measures how many steps I take in a day, stairs climbed, calories burned. After lunch, I log in what I've eaten -- Fitbit then tells me  how many calories I have left in the day. (Whenever you come near your computer, Fitbit automatically enters how many calories you've burned.)

I experimented with different ways of eating, including:

* vegan lasagna for dinner (so yummy! so healthy sounding! and, alas, when you really add it all up, so high in calories!)

*not eating all day so I could have a nice dinner 

*juice fasts

etc (other idiotic ideas)

What works:

* SMALL breakfast (less than 300 calories) -- usually, quinoa (which I love -- for those of you who don't know it: the Aztec super food! has MUCH more protein than other grains as well as a delicious nutty taste) with a few currants or dried cranberries (when trying to lose weight, QUANTITIES of these kinds of things count -- "a few" = 1 TBSP), and tea with almond milk (only 40 calories)....if I'm not hungry when I wake up, tea only and breakfast later

*lunch (I never want to stop what I'm doing or trying to do for lunch) is always quick: 2 of our local pasture-fed eggs, higher in protein, lower in bad cholesterol than free-range eggs -- either in what I call a fusion omelette  or egg salad on a lot of lettuce

*IF I need a mid-afternoon snack, which usually I do not: spicey lemonade (home-made: maple syrup, red pepper flakes, lots of lemon juice0): perhaps not for everyone but I like it a lot

*dinner is a HIGHLY delicious, high quality protein: really fresh fish (if there is any interest, I will post detailed instructions), lamb, chicken, or beef and green vegetables; salad only if I have the calories left for it. I find that if I have a high quality protein for dinner, I don't eat after dinner....if I must have something sweet, herbal tea with honey.

Alas, for now, anyway: no potatoes, no pasta -- vegan lasagna seemed like such a good idea on paper but always left me feeling hungry and thus eating after dinner. A nutritionist told me once that eating in the night is a sign that you haven't had enoug protein during the day and in my case this seems to be true.

Perhaps it is some kind of atavistic cavewomen wake-up-in-the-night-hungry? Go-out-and-kill-something! response.

It is also really helping:

1. To PAY ATTENTION to what I am eating -- not eat as an adjunct to another activity.

2. Not to have chocolate, nuts, or hard cheese in the house -- only feta, to be crumbled SPARINGLY on salad.

3. To say as a mantra that feeling slightly hungry is a sign that fat is being burned! -- but always eat something before I get really hungry.

4. To never ever eat or drink wine (which I do have with dinner) after dinner....water or herbal tea only!

A nice bath with some lavender in it helps too.

What works for you? Please tell -- the mantra came from a blog reader!

(yes, we've talked about this before, there does seem to be an almost fatal connection between writing and weight)

PS (off topic) Thank you, you in Australia, for what you told us about Frank McCord in your comment on my last post!

NOTHING TO DO WITH WRITING?

This week, I did a "detox" using juices from the amazing NYC vegan restaurant Blossom. I know these are not designed for weight loss, but to get rid of toxins -- but I *have* actually lost weight and feel lighter and brighter inside.

Those of you who have no issues with weight, read no further! This will sound crazy. Maybe it is. But for those few who do occasionally think about food and dieting, this little story may help -- and I'd love your insights, too. I don't think I would have been able to do this without a long conversation (over lunch, of course) with a friend.

The second day of a detox is apt to be really, really yucky -- headache, unable to think clearly, kind of weak, weepy.....detoxing has this affect on lots of people. At least if you believe in the mind body connection, it makes sense: you're releasing toxic emotions as well as things stored in your fat cells.

Be that as it may (and who knows if these things are even true?) I decided to think of this as a sign that a new start and a new me was on its way and use some of that "releasing" energy to get rid of stuff OUTSIDE of myself as well as inside: throw things away! Donate them! This had an energizing effect.

By Day 3 (the last of the detox), I was writing and doing lots of yoga -- though I admit to also thinking about food quite a lot, since I couldn't eat anything, only drink the juices. So, remembering the conversation about why I eat too much, I decided to use that day to plan meals and menus for the next week or so -- when I have healthy meals in the right portions READY, I eat sensibly.

But I hardly ever plan ahead enough. I run out of things. I make everything, always, from scratch -- there is no such thing as just eating something from a package or can or box in MY house. Plus I usually (even food-loving as I am) get absorbed in what I'm doing, especially around lunch time. I don't want to interrupt what I'm doing to cook -- so I skip lunch. If I'm babysitting, I skip meals because there's nothing in the house I can eat -- I'm gluten-intolerant and everything in the house has flour in it.

(Sample meal of one child in one household: Frito sandwich -- hot dog bun, spread evenly with Fritos on both sides).

The result is that by the end of the day I'm ravenous. This is my real dieting downfall -- getting so hungry that I eat mindlessly. Once I get that ravenous, it's all over.... If I'm that hungry (or upset or whatever), and DECIDING at every meal, I'll make bad choices. Also I think letting your blood sugar get that low really ruins your energy level for the rest of the day.

The solution:

1) spend some time every week planning, cooking. and packing things into single-portion containers

2) type up a menu and put it on my refrigerator

3) stick to it as rigorously as I've stuck to the juice fast.

If I do #1 and #2, (believe it or not), #3 will be easy, because I will have made one decision ahead 0f time, a decision that accounts for each meal and snack. Then I can and do stick to it, as I stuck to the juice detox. It's the getting really hungry and THEN deciding (or rather acting completely impulsively) that ruins everything.

So here's to new beginnings, which is what Easter and all the other spring-time fertility festivals all over the world are really about. (Alvina took this picture at an Easter BRGs gathering four years ago.)

For the next few weeks, I'm going to be posting the best meal of the week, with recipes -- and very briefly reporting on my progress. Since today I'm still fasting, I shall post what some of the kids I babysit for (not the frito-sandwich boy) call

LIBBY's FAMOUS SCONES

(makes 4 scones)

NOTE: Working with gluten-free flour is really different from working with wheat flour, which is why these directions are so detailed. Once you get the knack, the recipe takes less than 10 minutes of work, another 15 or so of baking time.

1 cup Bob's Red Mill gluten-free all-purpose flour

1 1/4 tsp. baking powder (still searching for one that tastes good --recommendations, anyone?)

1/4 tsp. salt

2 1/2 tablespoons butter OR Earth Balance buttery spread, original -- cold

2 1/2 tablespoons cream OR Silk Soy Creamer -- cold

1 egg -- the better the egg, the better the scones! If you can get fresh eggs, please use one

scant tsp. brown sugar

1 or 2 tsp. vanilla extract

2 bowls, rubber spatula, pastry blender or two knives, rolling pin -- I use the Finnish kind, which is tapered at the ends and allows you to roll really lightly -- pastry brush

preheat the oven to 400, assemble the ingredients

1. Sift the flour into a bowl with the salt and baking powder.

2. Beat the egg with the cream and vanilla and sugar in another bowl.

3. Cut the butter or Earth Balance into the flour. Don't touch it: just use the pastry blender or knives to break it into small pieces (pea size with some smaller). Don't cream it -- the buttery bits should stay distinct.

4. Pour in the liquids.

5. With a rubber spatula, scrape up from the bottom until everything is blended and the dough SORT OF sticks together into a ball.

6. Still using the spatula (gluten free flour is much more tender and delicate than wheat flour), flip the dough gently a few times.

7. Sprinkle some flour on the clean counter, and roll the dough out from the center VERY LIGHTLY, once or twice on each spot should be enough, until it forms a thick pancake.....about the size of a salad plate.

8. Cut it into 4 wedges and place on an ungreased pie tin or cookie sheet. Brush the tops with the left-over liquid.

9. Bake at 400 until the scones puff up and turn golden brown.

If anyone is interested, I will get someone to video me doing it.

NEXT WEEK: My progress, and either

*yam noodles (made with a Spiralizer!) and cashew cream sauce

OR

*Thai-inspired curried broccoli soup that uses coconut WATER instead of coconut milk or cream (much less fattening).

Meghan! I know you are rolling your eyes if you've even read this far, these vegetables are not your thing. Some people wouldn't like them, I know, but some people, I also know, will love them. They've eaten them and said so!

Lastly, I say this has nothing to do with writing; but really, it does. Working on a novel is like a long-term, gradual diet -- I can't write a novel in a few days any more than I could lose 3o pounds on a three day crash diet. It takes steady, persistent effort to make progress. And eating healthy foods in sensible amounts will give me the energy I need to finish.