Thursday, January 06, 2011

And as for 2011 goals...

I don't have any. When you get sick, as I am, you realize that there's no point in having goals because you never know what's going to happen to you. All I can do is take one day at a time. ONE DAY. That is all. I don't even want to see beyond a week. I used to be a workaholic and in a lot of ways I miss that. I had a lot of drive. I hope to get that back when I get things under control but I don't think I can ever have large goals again. I had a dream last night and my grandmother was in it. She died when I was a teenager. She was going to my funeral. I really miss her a lot. I'm not saying I'm going to die. All I'm saying is that goals would only make my situation worse. I feel like I can be a better person each day without them. I go to the gym regularly, I try to get my protein in, I try to update my website and be creative... and I'm getting myself out there. I feel that that's enough.


Grace Lin said...

I think those are good goals-- go to the gym, be creative--they are still pretty big goals. It's definitely enough.

Anonymous said...

Going to the gym and updating your website are more than many of us can manage. Also, a person who lives life one day at a time is probably living in a more spiritual dimension than most.


Libby Koponen said...

I think that sounds really sensible, Meghan -- and I agree with the others that doing those things is a LOT.

As you once said, the fatigue that comes from an auto immune disease isn't like ordinary tiredness. It takes over your whole life. I think you're dealing with it in a brave way and I admire your honesty, too, in putting this out on the blog.

Lastly, I think the stars book sounds fascinating! One of the kids I babysit for is really intersted in American History (he knew the names of many of the presidents, even the obscure ones like Franklin Pierce, when he was 2). He will love this book, I bet.


Anonymous said...

Gosh, I was/am actually feeling sick today. The headaches have returned a bit... and I forgot what my goal for today was--to work on the flag book! So now I'm reminded. See, I can't even remember to do anything anymore.

You guys should have seen what my goals WERE. I had long lists!

I've never thought of dealing with one day at a time as being spiritual. That's interesting.